I feel poised. I think i can stage a late semester comeback. And i'm in a workout routine right now which makes me feel good. Maybe the two are correlated somehow. I'm sure i could figure it out. Since i can calculate the covariance and correlation like a mother fuckin riot.

In the midst of mad april, I was able to get away yesterday to catch the cubs-cardinals game in STL. Greg Maddux was on the hill. Man that was a treat. It's the first time i've seen him or a pitcher of his caliber( By caliber, of course, i mean both the size of their gun barrels and the high quality of their characters....two meanings..caliber...it's homonym..forget it..) It was quite a game. Maddux is pitching out of mind this year. The cubs won marking the 4th straight time they've won when i was in the stands.

I took a test tonight. I have two more tomorrow. I have my senior math paper to work on. There is more too. My hands are kind of full. I did get a nice chunk of work done today. But as much as I did, it's still only something like 12 percent of the whole enchilada. Think i'm looking at heartburn city.

time for a gutcheck

I need to embark on a journey towards becoming a whole person.

I've been in kind of a trance today. A lot is going on..and i didn't get much sleep last night. As i was driving around at work tonight...I wondered...what does it all mean? Then I was able to see clearly. With the help of a good song, as they so often do, I was able to put it all in perspective. Gives it all some meaning...in the immortal words of t pain.....

" Got the body of a goddess , got eyes butter pecan brown I see you girl
Droppin Low, She comin down from the ceiling to tha floo
Yeah She know what she doin, yea yea yea
She doin the right thang, yea yea yea, I need to get her over to my crip and do that night thang
Cuz I'm N Luv wit a stripper, she poppin, she rollin, she rollin' "

T pain..you touched me man.....

Wow it's been over 2 months. School has been intense. It has been completely taking me over. It causes so much stress for me it's really a miracle I haven't had a stroke.

Anyway. Today , the NCAA Championships took place. I really though it was anti-climactic. I've thought UCLA was a bit overrated and have stated that they were overseeded as a 2. I think that they have been getting all the bounces up until tonight when they got thrashed by Florida. I'm no fan of Florida either as I believe they perennially underachieve. Florida just outclassed UCLA though. Just appeared to have superior talent at every position.

Also today was the cubs season opener. They beat the Reds 16-7. While i'm happy they won i'm worried about the pitching as always. Zambrano, their only reliable starter, only went 4 innings. And he looked to have absolutely no control. Almost every hitter looked good though, so i'm still optimistic about the season. This is a really different team then they've had in years past and i think they will surprise some folks.

In other news, school is just taking a bite out of my ass lately. My 15 page senior math paper is looming, and the rough draft is due tomorrow. Every class is stepping on the gas right now. And they're not slowing down til may 12th. The longer, warmer days should help. It's just better for my psyche.

Now i'm gonna say that i'll keep posting and then not

I saw a human pyramid once.....it was very unnecessary.

The first in a series of what i hope will be several top 5 lists involving movies, music and what not.

My top 5 directors and their top 5 movies-in no particular order

1. Stanley Kubrick
- Spartacus (I am Spartacus)
-Dr. Strangelove (Classic)
-Clockwork Orange (Nuts)
-The Shining (Here's Johnny)
-Full Metal Jacket(Intense)

2. Alfred Hitchcock
-Rear Window
-North by Northwest
-Vertigo
-Psycho
-Rebecca

3. Steven Spielberg (tough top 5)
-Jaws (Not with 3 barrels....you're gonna need a bigger boat)
-Raiders of the Lost Ark
-Indiana jones and the last Crusade( They have him..in the belly of that steel beast)
-Hook(just kidding)
-Schindler's List
-Saving Private Ryan

4. Martin Scorcese
-Taxi Driver
-Raging Bull
-Goodfellas
-Casino
-Gangs of New York

5. Joel & Ethan Coen
-Fargo
-Miller's Crossing
-The Big Lebowski
-O Brother Where Art Thou?
-The Man Who Wasn't There

Honorable Mentions...Tarantino obviously..just doesn't have the body of work yet.
-Woody Allen (Annie Hall etc...)
-Rob Reiner -- Here's a guy not many people would think of..but outstanding(Spinal Tap, Stand by me, Princess Bride, When harry met sally, Few good men)
-Oliver Stone(JFK, Platoon)
-Clint Eastwood--again doesn't have the body yet...(Million Dollar Baby, Unforgiven, Mystic River)
-Francis Ford Coppola(Godfathers, Apocalypse Now)
-David Fincher(Fight Club, Se7en, The game)

Probably more but i'm spent. Stay tuned.

First post from the new year. Things are well. School starts in a couple days. I've gotta get psyched for that. I always think am, but i'm really never ready. Oh well. Gotta grow up someday. Not a whole lot to say right now. Just wanted to touch base. I've been playing a good amount of poker lately with good results. I've won over a 1000 in the last couple weeks.

Go Bears

Tis the season....

The holidays have pretty good to me. I've spent a lot of time with my family. I love spending time with all the little kids. Austin, Audrey, Aden, Jakob, and Julia are the best. I have maintained good spirits for the most part. But every now and again my mind has wandered and i just daydream. A little depressed about something. I've done a lot of soul searching lately. Sometimes it's hard to do the right thing. And I find myself really sad at different times. It's really inexplicable really. I don't know even where to begin. I am just really, really happy ...and really, really sad. It's a powerful mixture. "And I do anything to just feel better." I hope for the best though. I'm an optimist by nature. Call it a curse maybe. To everyone I know....Happy Holidays. My outlook on a lot of different things has changed. A couple people are primarily responsible for this. You know who you are. I hope someone can affect each and everyone of your lives in a such a positive way. Reach out and open your guard. Let people in. Show emotion. Live. Take risks. It can be really rewarding. Put a little love in your heart...and the world...will be a better place.